Month: Feb 2023

What are the 4 biggest challenges my clients, men and people, face?

Here are 3 stories to illustrate, with 4 pointers at the end:

Client Steve has a challenge with a boss who he doesn’t get on with, doesn’t like as a leader and thinks that he leaves a trail of destruction in the organisation. He has tried speaking to him, tried having heart to hearts and attempting to cover every angle but nothing is making a difference.

But now he has been offered a promotion with another organisation – it’s bigger, better, and potentially far more rewarding. He wants to leave with all parties bigger, stronger, and wiser.

But he is stuck. I ask him what a great question would be to ask him, to help him get unstuck. He laughs, because it is always the same – as a devout Christian, he asks, “what would Jesus do?” He chuckles as he knows the answer: be loving, forgiving, unexpectedly generous, compassion and non-judgmental. He can now leave, free, self-expressed and marching boldly to his next assignment. There is closure.

Client Matt’s challenge is that he has set himself a world-record in his discipline and age group and is facing doubts: his inner critic is playing havoc, telling him how useless he is and that he will never do it. The noise in his head is from the past: don’t quit, like you did when you didn’t follow through on your swimming and rugby career. It’s the reason this has so much meaning for him. When prompted for the solutions he knows: follow the plan and stay in the moment. It’s all there is. He is on track for the big day on Saturday. He may break the record, but having fun is the key.

Client Roger’s challenge – we worked together 12 years ago and lost touch – is that he wants his Mojo back; he wants power in his life, to put to bed loose ends, a marriage breakup and a dying business, his retirement plan, which was decimated by Covid. In two short months he is back at the gym, taken the decision to close the business of 12 years and has taken responsibility for what went wrong in his relationship. He is freed up and going places and is on day 50 of doing 100 press ups per day, with the goal of doing it for 365 or more. He had not done a press up in years.

Can you see consistent themes in these 4 people? What are the common denominators?

I have been working and studying the findings, of what men’s biggest ‘Mojo Stealers’ are, and I recently had a brainwave: Look to The Four Agreements. It’s a great book by Don Miguel Ruiz, that advises following the following the Four Agreements for living a great life:

1. Be impeccable with your word.
2. Don’t take anything personally.
3. Don’t make assumptions.
4. Always do your best.

Can you see which of these (broken) agreements apply, above, and how they are fixed, by keeping to the agreements?

How about you, in your life? Click here for more info on the Four Agreements: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Four_Agreements

If you’re interested in getting your Mojo back, please be in touch or at least why don’t you click on this link and find out what’s your Mojo-Meter Rating is?

Mojestically yours,

Si.

P.S. Find out more about what I do and how I can help with the following offerings

• Information on my individual and group Mojo Coaching
• Get your Mojo Back – A 2-day Course in the forest where you will access the magical power of your Mojo.
• The Interactive Digital and in-person Mojo Dojo Course.
• Attend my monthly 90-minute Mojo Storytelling where you’ll discover the transformative effect of your stories.

In all honesty it didn’t start off as a noble cause but evolved into something that I find special: Helping men get their Mojo back.

Back in 1997, I was a photojournalist, and not a very happy one. I didn’t have a great sense of purpose and direction and was in a career I had kind of fallen into. That year I was invited to attend a self-development seminar, and boy, did the lights come on! It was essentially coaching and what struck me was that I realised after all these years I wasn’t that stupid! You see, I had really struggled academically at school, working my ass off to get the minimum requirement to become an officer in the British Army. I thought that my grades were me and that because I got flatline average grades, that made me flatline average.

I could not have been more wrong.  

On the seminar, the instructor shared ideas that I recognised as ‘truth’ but which I had never learned about or had access to, my intuition told me that I ‘was home.’

He spoke about telling the truth to oneself, being authentic, not being so worried about what ‘you think others are thinking about you,’ and being straight in communication.

My world seemed to expand in a moment as I saw new frontiers, new possibilities and new opportunities unfold before my eyes. I knew that this was what I wanted to do and by the end of the seminar, I had my future mapped out, or at least a place to aim at. I could see not only possibilities for myself, but also in helping others in their lives too.

I acknowledged that I was a novice and needed some guidance and coaching to get going and hired a coach to assist, most of all in having a target to focus on. Pretty soon we settled on entrepreneurs, which were in no short supply this being the time of the dot.com mania in the late nineties, where work, money and opportunities seemed to exist aplenty.

In 2001 I finally made the move back to South Africa and kept on with the coaching however my focus drifted and whilst I still coached entrepreneurs and small business owners mostly that initial velocity waned somewhat. At this time coaching began to burgeon.

In 2011 I had my next ‘re-invention’ which was as a ‘Teacher of Courage.’ Boy was I and well, just about everyone enthused by this! But alas, nothing really got going as I had imagined and hoped.

I couldn’t work it out.

Then, in 2021, I attended a 9-month marketing course with 15 other consultants and coaches. I was the youngest on the course at 54 the oldest been 84! I did because I was sick of not being able to introduce my services to people where things would happen on the scale, I believed was possible.

The instructor on the course, Robert Middleton, an expert in small business marketing, challenged my attachment and enthusiasm for the word courage by saying that it’s pitfall, as it is a direct challenge to people’s – particularly men’s – ego; after all we are quite self-deluded when it comes to our perception of ourselves, versus reality! Many of us think we are far more courageous, more often, than we are!

I can’t remember exactly how it happened, but Mojo made an ­appearance. It’s a wonderful word, full of mystery, humour, laughter, music, energy, life-force and so on. In essence mojo is ‘courage repackaged.’ Courage is all about heart – as is Mojo – from the Latin cor and the age meaning movement. At last I had found my groove and when I – along with universe’s help – came up with helping men get their Mojo back, the response was far more enthusiastic because I was addressing a target market as well as a need, and after all, many of us men had either lost our Mojo, never found it, or want it back! (I define Mojo as P.E.A.C.H – Passion, Energy, Authenticity, Confidence and Humour.)

So, I guess men have ‘found me’ as I have ‘found men’ too. Over the years 95% of my clients have been men. So, I guess it wasn’t really that complicated other than when I look in the mirror, I see people like me that I coach I suppose like energy attracts like energy.

And I suppose as an ‘accidental coach of men’ I am now seeing just now important it is and that men and young boys get the help and support we need, as women and young girls in many areas surge ahead, which is a great thing, as this video, below, so eloquently and beautifully depicts.

If you’re interested in getting your Mojo back, please be in touch or at least why don’t you click on this link and find out what’s your Mojo-Meter Rating is?

Mojestically yours,

Si.

P.S. What help do you need? Drop me a line

• Your Best year yet Mojo Dojo Support Yearly Support Programme (expires 28th Feb 2023)
• Get your Mojo Back – A 2-day Course in the forest
• Personal and Group Mojo Coaching
• The online Mojo Dojo Course in getting your Mojo back
• The free monthly Mojo Storytelling on the last Friday of the month.

How is the year going for you so far? Here we are at the start of February 2023. Are you where you wanted to be when you ‘set those resolutions?’

Where would I be without setting goals, having a plan and support structure?

The answer is in a very different place that I am now. I have the following support structures:

• A personal and business coach
• A financial partner
• A personal assistant
• A social media person
• A training, diet and exercise buddy
• A ‘PUNK’ group on WhatsApp (as in Press-Up’s and Plank) where we report in each and every day on our progress, (two guys of are doing 36,500 press ups this year.)

Sidenote: sometimes my mind hates this sh*t. It sometimes says to me, “forget it! Where’s the freedom in that? I don’t flippin’ feel like it!” You know that voice, don’t you? The voice governs you, or you govern the voice. It’s your call.

Where are you at?

Notice your response to these questions and depending on your answers, please allow me to assist you:

• What are your goals for the year?
• How are they going?
• What are you doing well? Not well?
• What accountability structure do you have?
• What happens if you fall behind?

Please join me in my goal accountability group, called Your Best Year Yet Mojo Dojo Support Group, and let’s get to work on what matters most to you!

You can fill out the form here: https://bit.ly/Bestyearyetmojodojo

What it is:

Join me and just up to 10 others from my community who want to win this year and make it their best year ever, day by day, moment by moment, and have this year be an extraordinary one.

Why it exists and how you benefit:

Because without this kind of structure – unless you are ultra-disciplined and even then, you are still human – you will not achieve the result of the satisfaction that you know is possible. You and I both know this.

With a structure around you and peers to support you, it becomes more difficult to not produce the results you want that are important to you.

How it works (below is in this form too. Here it is again:

https://bit.ly/Bestyearyetmojodojo

• Your name:
• What you do:
• How you heard about the Dojo:
• Email address:
• Contact number:
• What do you really want this year – don’t over think it, just write what comes to you:
• What are you willing to sacrifice that will stand you a very good chance of achieving that? e.g., distraction, alcohol, social media, trivia, time wasting, following through on my promises, going to bed at 21h30 on weekdays…
• The cost is an annual payment of ZAR25,000 or a monthly payment of ZAR2900 per month, or £2,500 or 290 per month. I am in/ I am interested and have some questions. Please call me!

Note:

• Registration closes on 28^th Feb 2023.
• You will receive a link to a Google Document, which will be your master Goal sheet, outlining your purpose, vision, goals, and strategy. You will be sharing this with others, and you will see other’s sheets too.
• At the end of each week, you will submit your results and actions for the following week.
• Every two weeks we will have a Zoom check in on progress, victories, challenges, reflections, and insights, and provide tools, process, and insights to assist us on our journeys.
• You’ll be assigned an ‘accountability buddy.’
• You will receive email and WhatsApp reminders from me.
• We will touch base personally with each other at least twice per month.

Good luck and here’s wishing you a great year ahead!

Mojestically yours,

Si.